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Sorry I’ve been missing so long.

The Elders decided that I have spent too much time amongst you Stone Walkers and I’ve been ordered to attend a ritual of purification or be kicked out of the tribe. Damn superstitious nonsense, but it would kill Mom if I was kicked out.  So…

I’ve spent the last three weeks rolling in mud, wearing sawgrass and climbing trees. Tomorrow I wrestle an alligator!  I forgot how much I missed grubs, especially Mom’s recipe with onions! Nom nom nom.

By a miracle, I have protected my phone (so far) but our camp site has zero reception. I had to trek 44 miles just to send this message!

Earlier tonight, I  saw a great post about Rahm Emmanuel, the slimiest of all Democrats, imho.  Apparently he refers to Washington D.C. as “Fucknutsville.”

Apparently I had you wrong, Rahm. You are only slightly less slimy than I originally thought. And for a Bigfoot covered in putrid Everglades mud, that’s really saying something.

I would kill for a shower right now.

I have no idea how much longer this ritual will last. Apparently you people have made me very, very dirty spiritually. And by some karmic hoax, the way to fix it is to make me physically dirty. FML

Batteries dying. Got to go.

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In response to an online argument whether modern Jihadists are more dangerous than the Nazis were…

Jihadists are not more dangerous than the Nazis. Not by a long shot.  More unpredictable – yes. Harder to identify – yes. Harder to kill – no. More dangerous – certainly not.

The Nazis had:

• a functioning, modern nation-state
• a growing economy
• an enormous, modern, mechanized army
• cutting edge science, especially in physics and chemistry
• a massive industrial base
• a highly educated workforce
• a modern air force
• the most advanced rocketry program in the world
• access to all natural resources
• and they were sitting right smack in the middle of the Great European Plain

The Jihadist have:

• training camps in Pakistan and Iran
• a video camera/tape recorder in bin Laden’s cave
• a Manhattan car bomb that doesn’t explode
• a shoe bomber
• and an underwear bomber

Hardly the most threatening of enemies.

And so you don’t think I’m being flippant, the Islamic Republic of Iran has:

• lots of real estate
• a huge brain drain
• a shortage of skilled labor
• a booming black market
• a rigid state-controlled economy
• double-digit unemployment
• very recent major political unrest
• plenty of oil
• and a US trade embargo that makes it cheaper for them to open new oil wells than to maintain old ones.

This is a country that is a net importer of gasoline for God’s sake! Their #1 export is oil, #2 is fruits and nuts! (source)

Everyone wants to make this so much worse than it really is. In reality, these people are no threat to the American way of life. Jihadists are social misfits, they’re the ones that didn’t get picked for the soccer team in 3rd grade so now everyone must die!

As for Iran’s Oh So Scary Nuclear Program, they don’t have the industrial or technological base necessary to enrich uranium to weapons grade. Right now they are still trying for 20% enrichment (source). They need to hit 90% and it gets harder to do the higher you go (source). Believing we are at an imminent crisis now is just plain alarmist.

I’m not saying they will never have the industrial base to enrich uranium to weapons grade. I’m saying they don’t have it now. And with increased international scrutiny, they’re going to have a bitch of a time getting the tech they need. As long as they can’t enrich it past 20%, then the only thing they can use it for is dirty bombs or power plants. Hardly an existential threat.

The media makes them sound like monsters out of some sci-fi horror flick. I assure you they’re not. There’s a big difference between political rhetoric designed to appease the radical element and actual, workable policy. The Tea Party will learn all about that soon.

Are they committed? Sure. Are they fanatics? Some are, yes. Are they a devastating foe that poses a greater threat to American freedoms and way of life than Germany circa WWII?

Please.

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